After 4 years and some high profile work I thought things might have changed by now but its not the change that makes a man, its the man who makes a change. Nothing around here has changed into something like an affirmation that god exists, no unicorns left a pile of wonder goo on my exes doorstep and i am still fucked for cash. If i wasn't smoking my last 2 cigarettes i could probably give a shit about that last bit. I am down to fucking straws and cigarette butts and still can't find a good client, or at least one who doesn't rape the dollar.

One of the reasons I am in school is so I can go back to being a cog in that great system of goods being bought and sold. I will be a commodity once more but only after I graduate from UCI can I do that. I've titled this series 'Living This Life' because its as dramatic as I am drunk. Plain and simple, its honest.

Then again I suppose drunken sincerity is open to debate but if you know my words or me you know I'm not spinning some dribble for the latest in social networking bs. Let the media concern themselves with their 'evidence' that same sex couples ruin America and forget that their kids are doing worse shit on Facebook than I've done on the back window of a sedan.

This is my life deconstructed phrase by phrase and word for word. This is just the beginning and I want my side of the story to be told. I've been called an asshole, a racist, a jerk, a shithead, an ass, a cunt, a fuckwad, a cheater and more. Although those labels were true its my task to make different choices in my life to grow. This is the story of how to ruin your life and break the ones you love.