whatever happened to those promises of yesterday? i'll catch you, don't every worry you're still all that matters to me. if I'm all that matters to you how come you don;t care enough to give the decency of an answer or a phone call? what the fuck is in your mind that you can't take 30 minutes to hear my side of things? I spoke most of my thoughts to the point of exhaustion last Sunday, the day you killed me. When you decided that you didn;t love me in that way anymore. fuck you. seriosuly, the biggest fuck you known to man. you hurt me worse than any other human being in my history of life. for some reason that doesn't strike you down...

so this is a tough weekend for you? bullshit, its my birthday you have ruined, on your bday i was there smiling face and tried to move past arguments. i am on my 3rd round of triple shots and pills. maybe you'll wakeup and i'll be gone. tried calling friends but no one is answering or calling back.

then i called ashlee, a girl i barely knew but i needed to vent what you've done. another person knows the evil you hold. at least toweards me, face front with a smiling face and others will be appeased.

i feel the bile moving towards my mouth. so hurtful and thoughtless to stab me with the words i lvoe you. blindly and carelessly thrwon about as ive discovered. i love lizzie. i love jaime. lizzie is a good person i can understand developing feelings of care for a good friend. but almost overnight? did i ever mean anything to you? i think not.

'it's been a long time since I've been close to you it's been awhile since I've really spent time with you, wish I could take back the times that I had. there was a time when I thought you were a friend to me I think those times I was probably just drunk and if they offered a test about being a good friend, I'd put money down that you'd surely flunk the only thing that you ever really did for me is make me oh so miserable and the hope that I never see your face again is anything but questionable'
alk 3 - jaked.....

once again they get me through shit you've thrown at me. drag the dagger deeper, what would that be 8th time around? should be more fun. next time you put the gun to my head, pull the trigger and do us both a favor.