well here's it is 8 days before I turn 20 and only 2 people outside of family have remembered.

remember when it was your birthday and I called to tell you I love you and I'm glad I have friends like you in my life? The time I sacrificed my needs to help you with something you wanted. Bought you the game you wanted, we spent so many hours playing. Sitting in the park playing guitar, or at a dead coffee shop we sang glorious tunes. With those words and actions I let my guard down and have allowed myself be assaulted by you. so your words booming in my head months after you took leave of me, I have no way to come to grips with this situation.

'you could slit my throat and with my one last gasping breath, i would apologize to you for bleeding on your shirt'

can't stop thinking of all the great things we've done for each other in our past, taking heat for each other, running around late at night, staying up all night after I took heat and was kicked out of my house, just so you wouldn't get in trouble with your parents. Driving around at 3AM in Seal Beach, trying to find a good enough sand slope to try and surf down. The longboard skateboard towing incident, I don't regret that one bit. So this is for you.

Thrice - Phoenix Ignition

Like a phoenix ignition
Like a crematorium
Like a swelling volition from the barrel of a gun
From the ashes and the embers
Like a rocket I'll ascend
Like a cry gone up for a fallen friend
I'll ascend
Everyday tear down these walls
Till cornerstones remain
Coming one step closer all the time
And although we'll never reach perfection
Always persist to try
Always try
No regrets just rebirth
Move forward and ignite
Incandescent reinvention
A new renaissance
A new fire each day

happy birthday to me. happy birthday.